If God wanted us to vote, he would have
given us candidates.
The problem with political jokes is they
We hang the petty thieves
and appoint the great ones to public office.
If we got one-tenth of what was promised
to us in these State of the Union speeches, there wouldn't be any inducement
to go to heaven.
Politicians are the same all over. They
promise to build a bridge even where there is no river.
When I was a boy I was told that anybody
could become President; I'm beginning to believe it.
Why pay money to have your family tree
traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you.
Politicians are people who, when they see
light at the end of the tunnel, go out and buy some more tunnel.
Politics is the gentle art of getting
votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to
protect each from the other.
I offer my opponents a bargain: if they
will stop telling lies about us, I will stop telling the truth about
Stevenson, campaign speech, 1952~
A politician is a fellow who will lay
down your life for his country.
I have come to the conclusion that
politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians.
~Charles de Gaulle~
Instead of giving a politician the keys
to the city, it might be better to change the locks.
There ought to be one day -- just one --
when there is open season on Congressmen.